No, We Weren't Together

I had a phenomenal Thanksgiving, though.... When I was 7 we moved to Audrey Street. Ruevonne & Bernie Harmon and their five little ones lived at the corner of Audrey and Eastway in east Charlotte. The school bus stopped in front of Ruevonne's house and I'd be there to catch the bus every morning. Her children were stair-stepped, 5,4,3,2,1 (I kid you not) and at 7 I found some quick and able playmates in her household. My grandmother lived with us. Granny looked after me, while Momma worked, but when I was 8 Granny had a heart attack. We laid her to rest in the family plot in Raleigh.

Momma put me in a daycare that summer. I had to ride a bus with her to her office, then transfer from the "Rose Garden" next to the football stadium and ride a second bus. I got off at the square and hiked three blocks to a church facility. Mom wasn't too comfortable with that, and when Ruevonne offered to keep an eye on me, it was a done deal. And so I came to live with the Harmon’s, at least from 4 to 6 pm in the winter and 7am to 6 pm in the summer. Just about everything I know about family life came from the Harmon household.

We drifted a bit over the years, marriage took me out of the state, but I've always clung to the family, through thick and through thin. No matter what happened, the Harmon’s were the Harmon’s.

It is with great pleasure that I tell you the Harmon’s are still the Harmon’s, and I delighted in being with them on Thanksgiving Day. Every one of the women is a tremendous cook and everyone pitched in to provide an absolutely superb meal that was held at Jeff and Carla's Victorian home in Shelby. Carla seated 20 of us at a semi-formal dinner. There were four generations present, but of course not everyone came, like most families these days they are somewhat scattered.

So, I feel like I went home for Thanksgiving, and to a home from long, long, ago, to my people, the first people, outside of family, who claimed a place in my heart, and who have held my hand through better and worse. We've been though marriages and mortgages, babies and bottles, death and divorce, love and loss. We are still here -- and we are the better for it.

"The more the diamond is cut, the brighter it sparkles, and in what seems hard dealing, there, God has no end but to perfect his people." says Guthrie. In childhood, I learned that when you're under siege, under pressure, that's when you have to do the right thing, the good thing, for character is not a blessing bestowed, but grows slowly from a unending series of tough decisions.

And so, this Thanksgiving, because my husband was away, I accepted an invitation I might have otherwise have declined, and I rejoice today, because the continuity of family, the old time American Family, and the new Modern Family, is the same. The LOVE is the same. And I needed to see that. And I know your BS meter is pinging like crazy. And I want you to understand, I'm not saying the wizard behind the curtain is anything other than what he is. What I am saying is: when it all comes down, when the curtain is raised, we get to choose what we take to heart.

My heart is set for Christmas.

“And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make.” Abby Road, The End Song, the Beatles.

And that’s something to think about.