Contact Form

Name

Email *

Message *

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Jack Handey Quotes

If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.

quotes.prolix.nu/Humor/Jack_Handey/

There is nothing sadder than a mosquito sucking on a mummy. Give it up little guy.

Today I accidentally stepped on a snail on the sidewalk in front of our house. And I thought, I too am like that snail. I build a defensive wall around myself, a "shell" if you will. But my shell isn't made out of a hard, protective substance. Mine is made out of tinfoil and paper bags.

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone’s neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing?

If you are ever skydiving, and your parachute fails, and your friends are all watching youu fall, I think a good gag would be to pretend you're swimming.

http://www.thedigitalcourier.com/

"A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure."~ Unknown Carol's fb page

No comments:

Post a Comment